Sensual/Sexual Meditation Practice
One only reaches a state of meditation for brief periods, if at all, as the mind will want you to notice that you aren’t thinking and then alas, now you are thinking again! But practice makes perfect. Meditation is an inner seeing and sex is enhanced by intimacy (in-to-me-see). Tantric sex includes meditating with the beloved knowing that the act of sex brings you closer to the God or divine in one another. On the other hand, casual sex is simply a meditation on the genitals, with orgasm as the goal, aka “Fast-food Sex.”
I recommend beginning with a solo practice, whether you are in a relationship or not. Once you have created luscious habit of self loving sensual/sexual meditation, you’ll have much more juice to bring to your relationship!
How do you make time for sexual meditation and/or pleasure? Put it on your calendar, your iPhone, your computer with regular alerts! Create a daily 5-10 minute practice during the week and a 1/2 hour practice on the weekend.
Set the stage: create or weave a special cocoon with your vivid imagination. If at all possible, a candle-lit bath or ‘pleasure nest’ just for YOU with your favorite music, scent, lighting, fabrics, mirrors, art. Look at yourself in a mirror while you relax and SEE the transformation of the busy you into the pleasure
goddess that you are. Anoint yourself with oil… massage your own breasts (not just your nipples) but give yourself a sensual breast massage just for the pure “health” of it. Massage your inner thighs and especially any area (belly?) that you think is too fat, or too flat, or too something. If you don’t love yourself, who will? YOU are your own most intimate partner. Practice loving yourself and your self will love you better!!
Bringing Sensual/Sexual Meditation to a Partnership
During sex, meditate on your partner (what! look at them? Yes!) Eyes-open enhances intimacy. Let your eyes say what your words want to say (slower darling or take me, beloved or you’re mine, sweetheart or I adore you, honey. Your eyes are powerful tools to enhance sexual pleasure. Capture your mind and make it work for you!
If eyes are closed during sex, meditate on your own breath. Meditate on the scent of your partner. If his or her eyes are closed, open yours! Surprise them by being present even if they seem to be in their own world, the world of pleasure! Use your inner vision to follow your breath… up the spine and down again.
Or, use your internal vision to feel your breath coming into your nostrils… and out again… in an endless wave of coming in and going out. Like the lapping of the sea upon the shore, it relaxes the brain from all its busyness and turmoil.
Feminine Libido Enhancer
While sitting at your desk or meditating on your mat, spend 5-10 minutes meditating on internal muscle exercises as outlined below. These are not kegels, but secrets from the ancient Eastern practices of Tantra and Taoism. Ask your brain to follow your breath and the parts of your body that you are feeling. Take a break from working while at your desk even if your eyes are open… you can use internal gazing or no focus with eyes open.
This practice brings more blood flow to your sexual center, arousing your life force, and distributing it upward with breath toward your brain. It also prepares your sexual organs inside and out to engorge, wake up, and feel their aliveness
1. INHALE deeply and hold breath.
2. While holding, SQUEEZE your internal muscles … tighter… tighter… tighter.
3. EXHALE and relax these muscles completely … until you feel a pool of energy beneath you.
REPEAT 2 more times… squeezing as you hold the breath… relaxing as you exhale.
4. Now inhale deeply, hold breath while pulsing the muscles (squeeze-relax-squeeze-relax-squeeze-relax).
5. EXHALE slowly while relaxing your muscles. When all the breath is out, begin your next sequence.
6. INHALE slowly and pulse (squeeze-relax-squeeze-relax-squeeze-relax)
7. EXHALE deeply while relaxing all tension in the muscles
REPEAT 2 more times and let go of all technique
8. MEDITATE on the energy you have cultivated that you are now “sitting on!”
While meditating on the energy, a woman might repeat to herself:
I am a goddess of pleasure
All acts of love are my rituals
I live in a perpetual state of orgasmic bliss
This is my birthright
Meditating your way to Bigger Orgasmic Pleasure
during Clitoral Orgasm
Meditate on breathing into and from your aroused clitoris. Use your inner imagery to imagine it growing taller than Empire State Building! If with a partner, imagine it growing through the upper palate of your partner’s mouth and into his brain (now you are penetrating his brain into a heightened state of consciousness!).
Rather than tightening your legs and shortening your breath, relax your pelvis, deepen your breathing while sounding Ahhhhhh on the exhale. LOUDER… LOUDER (into a pillow if need be, but LOUDER!)
State clearly… I’M COMING!! After exhaling fully, take in another deep breath, sipping your pleasure as if through a straw right up into your brain. See it lighting up like Fifth Avenue at Christmas.
Let me know how you like these techniques by commenting below.