Six months of planning! Growing out my hair, longer than it’s been in 25 years. Finding a local photographer for a photo shoot so I would have new pictures to show you on Facebook and on my website. Choosing the perfect days… the perfect weather… for perfect outdoor pictures…. The perfect yet vulnerable divinely feminine me!
I say vulnerable as I mused How many more times will I do photo shoots in this career and lifetime? Can they photoshop some of the sun damage on my arms and legs? Oh yeah, just wear long sleeves even if it is 100 degrees in the sun (duh). Self-doubt is common, I know, whether young and lacking in confidence or aging and not wanting certain things to show up in the photos! I caught myself in every trap that I help women avoid – always aware of walking my talk.
The alarm on my iPhone softly beams me up at 5:00 a.m. with the hair dryer shaping my long tresses… while I carefully apply a natural look in the oval mirror as dawn creeps in the window behind my dressing table offering warm morning light. Oh, the taste of my Maui coffee while I watch my sweetheart purr softly under the light covers in the pink dawn. I feel like a leading lady on the set getting ready for the director and cameraman to arrive…. all eyes on me, Queen for a Day!
I dress and grab a few extra tops for the morning shoot, following the photographer in my car as his truck winds up through the Sierras on its way to a meadow in Hope Valley (how appropriate the name) where we will carry and schlep everything to a variety of yummy spots near rushing streams of fresh snow melt. He has multiple pieces of equipment hanging from his strong shoulders while I gracefully pack in my beauty bag filled with the accouterments of the feminine plus water and snacks.
The now-hot sun lights up my inner glow. The nascent green grasses blow softly in the high mountain air. By now I couldn’t care less how my hair looks or what I’m wearing… I just know I am in God’s country where the Goddess feeds my soul. Camera… where? Pose… how? I just want to cry it’s so beautiful, and after many blinks of tearing eyes, the morning progresses with click after click of the camera and the Goddess dancing together in the high mountain meadow.
It took me about 3 days to come down from that leading role! Remembering that my teaching and my healing work are the nuts and bolts of my career, I can now step up to embrace the many testimonials of me and my work… the very core of my assignment as the founder of Divine Feminine Awakening for women and couples who are drawn to deeper love and pleasure.
An aside: I made sure I was photographed without a smile, compassionately listening to his girlfriend tell me her childhood story of violation and abuse, as that is my true nature. I listen to you with the same heart full of caring because I know your story is your doorway to freedom.
See you soon… let’s talk,
Big Love, Caroline
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Glorious YOU!! I adore every flavor of you, beloved friend, mentor and partner in play! Wonderful photos. Precious, vulnerable story. Thank you.
Love you …and your beautiful essence shines through your photos! Gorgeous pictures!
Awwwww…. my Sistas love me, and I love YOU, now and always!!!! Without your loving friendship life would be a lonely place. xoxoxo
Absolutely beautiful!
Always love …,
Anoek
What a gorgeous picture.. the long tresses.. I think these may be my favorite of all darling Queenie!!
It’s in your eyes, Caroline. They shine with the greatest caring and carry the light of the Universe. This is what I remember from my time with you. Not any sun damage, but a women whose devotion to the Goddess is alive and contagious! I doubt those mountains in Hope Valley were wondering if we looking at their age lines. No, it’s their majesty. As we age, we need to know our value without question. Yours is so apparent — in your gorgeous photos and your powerful work. Thank you!
Looking FABULOUS, Queenie!!
Love you always, Miriam
Do you realize how beautiful you are Caroline? Every inch of you is Gorgeous, and all the parts that are jarring to you are NOT – they are Divine and so so lovely.
You are stunning – outside and in.
Love,
Hope
PS -maybe take the words sun damage and shift them to “my loving relationship with the sun.” How many fabulous years of That have you had? :))